Communication & Mutual Problem Solving: Lesson 9

We've all heard the term "communication is key", and to some extent that is very true. However there is something about communication that we need to take a closer look at. I don't think we have a problem trying to pick up on what people are trying to communicate, so much as how we interpret what people are trying to communicate. This is called encoding and decoding.

For example, encoding might occur when someone is being quiet because they are shy around someone that they have recently met, and incorrect decoding occurs when the person they just met feels that they are being standoffish or judgmental. Studies show that communication is 14% verbal, 35% tone, and 57% non-verbal. Do you see how incorrect communication might disrupt an entire relationship? This occurs more often than not, and if we cannot come to a knowledge of it and learn how to use this knowledge, our family systems could suffer significantly.

"We want to communicate not just so clearly that we are understood,

 but so clearly that we cannot be misunderstood."

 - Harold B. Lee